Categories
Growing Up House Life Medical School

Capstone Essay

My room is mostly finished! Minus some wall art and some diploma[(s) now!] that I haven’t hung up.
IMG_7287
It’s much more subdued, neutral, and calming now, which will be good for medical school in 2 months, 8 days! My favorite part has to be the window area which I added twinkle lights to at the last minute.
IMG_2924
 
Anyway, my final for my capstone class was to write a reflective essay looking back into our science education. I ended up really liking mine. So, here it is if you want to see how I got through OBU science. I wish I had gone more into my calling to medicine and how I knew all the suffering would be worth it, but I focused mainly on the science instead.
“Some would see my choice to attend a Baptist university as a way to limit my education, my world, and my views, but in fact the opposite has proven true. The last four years have opened my mind to knowledge I did not know I could have, questions I could not fathom, and wonder I didn’t know was possible. Personally, I have grown. My general education classes have taught me a great deal, but it is science where I have learned the most. I think a good objective definition of science is that it is the body of knowledge we have about the natural world through systematic experiments and observation. Science is how the world works. However, being a student of science has taught me so much more than that. For one thing, I’ve learned how vast the world is, and how small I am. Being a science student has strengthened my faith and allowed me to question things about my faith that I had never considered. Four years ago, I blindly accepted my faith in God and blindly accepted the science I was taught as well. Now, I question both, and am able to find the answers; answers that I can flesh out and struggle with and understand better in the end. I am also okay with not knowing the answer, which is something that I do not know I could say as a freshman. Science has become a big part of my belief system and a part of finding my purpose in the world. In order for me to be a part of science, I have to rely on the assumption that science is making the world a better place overall. I want to be a part of the kind of science that does good for people. My favorite lessons in science are the ones that have left me speechless and astounded in awe of my Creator. Some other favorites include those that I have learned from listening to my classmates’ views and opinions.
The biology program at OBU broke me down mentally. I switched my major from undeclared to biology after I had already begun as a freshman. I was only in the department for three years, but it has been grueling. I remember driving home one school night as a sophomore because I couldn’t take it anymore. I was done studying. I considered dropping out or transferring. My friends from freshman year have had nowhere near the workload I have. I spent hours and hours sitting down studying by myself. I hate sitting down, and I would much rather be with other people. Looking back, it was nothing more than a hard adjustment, because the payoff has been so much more than worth it. Then, again in my junior year- I was taking physics and organic with the sophomores- I hit another wall, hard. The workload is ridiculous and my grades were not showing the fruits of my labor. I was flailing. I wanted to quit again, but I relied on what I knew I had already made it through. Though sometimes I hated science, it helped me realize my potential and to continue to face adversity, knowing I could handle it. After I turned in my Organic 2 final, I cried in Dr. Malmberg’s office asking him why he had to make it so hard, and why I studied and studied but my grade was so low. He put it simply.
“So that you realize your dependence on God.”
I am extremely aware of my dependence on God because of science. But I also know now that when I resolve to do something, I can do my best no matter how much it will take out of me.
As a runner, the worst part for me is right before a race, at the starting line. I know what I have to do to hit a personal record, and I am aware that I am going to hurt. My legs will beg me to stop; my lungs will feel like they’re going to burst. I get afraid that I won’t be able to make it and I slow down. Every time. Now, headed into medical school, I am at the starting line of a whole new, rigorous program. Just like if I were running, I should be scared. I should be bracing myself for the “hurt”, but unlike in running, I know that I can make it through. The science program broke me down, but it has built me back up stronger than I was before.
I had never explored science and faith together before my four years here. The two remain separate and non-conflicting. Science is what is physical and natural. God is metaphysical and real but not able to be proven by the methods of science. Still, in my mind, the two feed into each other. My relationship with God is fed by the awe I experience when I learn. The intricacies of cell biology and genetics have changed my life. The volume of activity occurring at the microscopic, even molecular level continually blows me away. It’s so orderly. The amount of things you can learn about one infinitesimally small process in a cell, is completely mind-boggling.
Science’s role in society has become evident to me mostly in this past year. I have realized through capstone, being accepted into medical school and our non-textbook readings in developmental biology, that my science education has a lot of implications for the world around me. One of my favorite memories is a vaccine discussion we had in capstone. As a class, we examined our views from the perceptions of the opposing views, or the views of a layperson, who does not necessarily understand the hard, scientific literature we cite for our own opinions as scientists. I could discuss things like that all day long. I love challenging and discussing ethics, arguments, and science. I am excited to use my unique point of view and scientific education to better understand the people around me and especially what they believe and why. In developmental this past semester, we also spoke about the importance of popular science and writing. The Annie Dillard and Scientific American readings have inspired me to use my writing voice in science somehow. Of course, I also hope my medical education and further scientific endeavors will have some impact on society, even if just within a community.
These four years have taught me so much in terms of sheer knowledge- objective fact. I would be proud of my degree if that was all I had obtained during this time in my life. Perhaps, more than that, I am proud of what has happened to me on this journey. I share a bond with my fellow science students because of what we know we have all lived through. I have had my mind opened wide and want to fill it with all that I can. I am stronger, more assertive, and more sure of myself. I am a scientist now. It is a title, I did not know I wanted. But, I smile every time Dr. Jett refers to my classmates and I as scientists. I will always cherish my time at OBU and forever consider myself a student of science.”

Categories
House Life Products

Introduction to THE STUDY ROOM

I’m trying to think of a clever name for the study room that will become my office during medical school but nothing has hit me yet.
Here it is! The official before pictures. You’ll see it evolve more and more starting when I get back to Tulsa after graduation (10 days 21 hours and 39 minutes from now), but who’s counting?

IMG_2195
It looks a mess right now!

IMG_2198
Right now the room serves as a guest bedroom, game room, craft room, and storage closet.
First order of business will be to get rid of the junk (including the pac man machine) and condense the closet.
Next, we will restore, build, or buy furniture and put my desk in and make it functional as an office.
It will still serve as a guest bedroom when my girls come to visit! So the bed stays.
Lastly will be setting the mood and prettying it up to be an inspiring, productive space for use throughout medical school!
 
I have big plans for this room.
Screen Shot 2014-05-06 at 10.32.43 PM
I’m going with a soft color palate of teal and beige with pops of salmon. I’m looking for a lot of natural textiles like raw wood, burlap, sea glass and plant-y things. The bedspread, I want neutral and vintage. Lamps, lights, and chair can be sort of industrial. The art I want to be animal, plant or anatomy/medical inspired. I also want to incorporate a comfortable reading area with twinkle lights somehow.
I can’t wait to see how it turns out and update you guys on the process.
*A lot of these images (especially paint colors) I got from Young House Love. The sawhorse desk is something I made. I found the vintage medical posters on pinterest. Other places I looked grabbed pictures from include Ikea, Target, West Elm, and Etsy. If you need a specific source let me know! I’m not trying to copy someone else without crediting them.

Categories
Life Medical School Products

Random happenings

I won’t have much time to post today and into this weekend! I took an early weekend and went to Tulsa for lots of exciting things.
Such as getting a new car! Well, seriously shopping for one anyway. I’ll update about my choices and decisions when I get there.
Also I have to go up to my future medical school (eek!) and do a few things for financial aid. And, I’ve been questioning my white coat choice size. So I need to go up there and try them on again before the deadline. (I picked a smaller one because it looked better on.) The lady in the bookstore was rushing everyone and pressuring people to go a size up for better range of movement so that you can bend and easily wear layers under it. But I don’t know what to do. It’s such a hard decision. The next size up almost swallows me and the sleeved were too long. What should I do?!
An update on my medical school scholarship dilemma: I got a letter in the mails saying I was not selected to receive the endowment to practice in a rural setting. So, that decided for me I guess. I guess it came across that I wasn’t really fully committed to it yet and they determined it was not the right fit. Probably do the best anyway, now I get to decide exactly what it is I want to do without signing any binding contracts! So, I’m happy with how it’s working out.
And last but not least, I have a needtobreathe concert to attend but not til Friday night! Thats right, my boys are in my very own city and it’s pretty much illegal for me to miss that sort of thing.
A quick recommendation for all you dry skin people out there like me: CERAVE!

20140501-132535.jpg
This stuff is amazing. I’ve been using it for years but it’s a really thick lotion so I don’t use it that much, but I need to start again.
I’ve been sunburned 5 times since February. (Seriously what special breed of white girl gets sunburned in February!?)
And the winter left my skin super dry-it’s always a little dry anyway.
Usually I can get by with just putting some in scented body lotion on my face before bed but lately my nose has been pink and irritated, my cheeks have flaky dry skin and my forehead looks like leather. So I got my tub of CERAVE out and put some on the last couple days and my face is sooo much better.
They sell it at drug stores and it seems expensive ($12 for the tub) but this jar has lasted me at least a year. I put it on my legs, elbows, stomach, back, whenever I get really dry and itchy and it makes me soft and soothed. I was actually originally told to get it by my dermatologist when I had itchy legs from keratosis but every single other lotion made me even itchier. I’ve since found out that I’m allergic to fragrances in lotion and I grew out of the keratosis but I still love my CERAVE. Try it if you need it!